I Should Rename This Blog to “Bao’s Burgers and Lentils”

There seems to be a very obvious trend in my cooking lately:  I make lots of new, weird hamburgers, and cook an almost obsessive amount of lentils.  I probably need to be stopped.  In any case, a couple days ago I reaaaally started craving a Vietnamese sammich, a banh mi, which is traditionally made with pork and served on a baguette.  But I wanted lentils too!

Voila my lentil banh mi burger, another bastardization of someone else’s culture.  It’s also 100% vegetarian, and if you replace mayonnaise with something else that’s probably disgusting, it’ll be vegan, too.  You won’t miss the meat, I promise.

Lentil Banh Mi Burger

Lentil Banh Mi Burger
Serves 2.

For the burgers:

1/2 cup dried lentils
Kosher salt
1/2 onion, finely chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
Pinch of crushed red pepper flakes
1 tbsp chopped fresh basil
1/3 cup plain dried bread crumbs or panko
1 tsp corn starch
2 1/2 tsp sugar
2 tsp fish sauce
2 tsp sriracha
1/2 tsp kosher salt
1/2 tsp rice vinegar

For the dressing:

2 tbsp mayonnaise
1-2 tsp sriracha (to taste)
2 tsp chopped scallions

Bring the lentils, 2 cups of water, and 1/2 tsp of salt to boil and cook until very very tender, about 20 minutes.  Meanwhile, saute the onion, garlic, and red pepper flakes in a little vegetable oil in a pan over medium-low heat until the onions are translucent and soft.  Do not let them brown.

Drain lentils and add to a medium bowl.  Add onion mixture, basil, bread crumbs, corn starch, sugar, fish sauce, sriracha, 1/2 tsp salt, and vinegar.  Using a potato masher, your hands, or anything similar, mash everything together until well combined and shape into two patties.  At this point, you can pop them in the fridge for a few minutes so they firm up.

Combine the mayo, sriracha, and scallions.  Set aside.  Heat some veggie oil in a large frying pan over medium to medium-high heat and fry the patties on both sides until brown and crunchy and yummy looking.  Slather some mayo on a hamburger bun, a crusty roll, toast, English muffin, etc, and then add a patty and enjoy!

(Sometimes) I am Cheap Enough to Use Leftovers

I am unapologetically pretentious enough to admit that I loathe leftovers.  Despite the fact that I cook far too much food than necessary and most of the food winds up in the fridge, I wholeheartedly shirk from any sort of economical reuse of last night’s meal.

One leftover I do make use of, however, is pasta.  You can make it into a frittata or heat it up in some garlic oil and have a second Italian bonanza.  Since it reconstitutes remarkably well if properly encouraged, I find myself boiling a bit more than I need so I can create something tasty the next day.

The Italians stole pasta from the Chinese and I feel there’s a kind of poetic justice in reclaiming leftover noodles for their intended purpose, and thus was born my ghetto ramen.  I say ‘ghetto’ only in the sense that I know several Japanese who would curl up and die at this dish, but I’m going for flavors I like more than authenticity.  In any case, it’s far healthier than instant ramen, which has enough sodium and fat in it to kill a small donkey.

Ghetto Ramen

Before you critique my chipped chopsticks, please realize they’re my personal set that I’ve used since my first long-haul in Japan in 2000.  Recipe follows the jump!

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Les Lentilles, J’Adore

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Curried Lentils and EggsA few months ago I started an affair, the passion of which shows no sign of fading.  My partner is the lentil, a sassy little pulse delicious in any incarnation, be it brown or green or red.  Don’t get me wrong; it’s not that I’ve discovered the lentil only recently.  We’ve been acquainted for years.  It’s more like growing up and suddenly realizing that your childhood friend is hot as hell and you are, in fact, in love with them.  So yes, my lentils, I love you.

I suppose that the big revelation came when I made salmon and lentils for myself a month or so ago, with the lentils dressed in a mustard and lemon butter.  It was pure sex, so much so that I insisted on making it for my friends (which led to what I like to call ‘LentilQuest 2010’ — a tumultuous traipsing around Rockville, Maryland to find the perfect lentil).  Despite having gorged myself on fried pickles at Hooters, which is a story for another time, I cleaned my plate — a rare occurrence for moi.

In any case, I eat lentils on an almost daily basis, either prepared simply, or jazzed up in some fashion.  Yesterday, for example, I decided to have lentils for breakfast, and since Matt and I love Indian flavors (nothing is better than garam masala, dudes), the following recipe was born.  You can serve the lentils alone, but I cannot imagine anything better than a fried egg on top, with the yolk oozing down…

Curried Lentils and Eggs

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